Hubby leaving soon!

[soldiersgurl23]

This is going to be our first deployment.He leaves next month and the closer it gets the more I start to lost it.How do u ladies get thru it.My hubby hasnt even left yet and all I want to do is cry.And on top of him leaving Makayla will turn 1 the same month he leaves and im 14wks pregnant.So im going to be here doing everything on my own.I was going to go back home but its just to much troblem.Srry im just upset and my friends dont understand because their not army wifes and dont have to go thru it.I guess thats it I just had to let some things out.

[Kathryn]

We don't know how we do it..we just do it. That's all you can really do. Just keep yourself busy with hobbies and such. You have kids so that helps out too. Also, you have us! =]

[KristiMarie]

Keep yourself busy! You will get by it day by day, dont look at things too far in the future, it overwealmes you. Just take it a day at a time! And of course become a MTMH addict :)

[Meredith]

I'm with Kathryn...it frustrates me when civillians ask me that cause...there is no "way" to do it. It sucks and you just take it one day at a time until it's over. You just keep moving. It's ok to feel bad for yourself for a little while but don't make it a habit. It's hard to keep moving when you feel like ass so try to keep your chin up. I'm on number two and I've found that the month or so before and probably the first month are harder than the rest of it...the anticipation sucks. So just hang in there, once he leaves and the days start going by it won't take as much out of you.

[soldiersgurl23]

Thanks ladies.

[Kathryn]

Also..this is something I did and it really did help. Make other count downs that lead up to him coming back! Justin's deployment started last January and ended in August...so I would make count downs for holidays or other events I had during those months. Anticipating other things made the deployment go by faster for me. So maybe try that!

[52409JERNBDW]

im going to be on my first deployment with James, but it will be his second, im not pregnant or any of that, but i have been down in the dumps because its sooo SOO close, hes going in the beginning of March, but i did what Kathryn did for school so it would go by faster, and that's what im going to do while hes gone, he still doesn't know how long hes going to be over there but the most is nine months. and i agree with the girls, there is no actual way to do any of it, and yeah keep yourself busy to keep your mind off of it, and that's why im going to try and get my car fixed and get a couple side jobs!. so don't think your gong to be the only "newbie" doing this!!!!! lol anything else you could message me,

[Ashley945]

crystal
you will get through it somehow, keep urself busy and ur baby will keep u busy.... but anyways u sound like me. we have alot in common. but this isnt new to me my hubby leaving, it never gets easier, i think the more they leave the harder it gets, my hubby is on his 3rd tour right now over there, he left almost a week ago, i have a 11month old son that will be one soon, and im almost 17 weeks prego, so im counting down the days til june 9 when he comes back for the babys birth, but hes home for 3 wks and then leaves til 2011:( i didnt move back home either bc it was alot of work and plus we own our house! so i def know where you are coming from. i do it alone anyways while hes home bc he works alot and is gone alot to begin with.so it wont be any different, i fine doin git alone, its life, what us armywives have to do:) trust me you will be fine and busy!!!!! but i love my life and i love him so i do what i got to do and stay busy and countdown. hes my highschool sweetheart, my hubby, my everything. good luck and be strong:)

[Erin]

The ladies are right, there is no way, you just have to do it. Big M has missed so many milestones (1st birthday being one of them) and at first I was just so focused on what he was missing. Instead try to turn it around. I know it's really hard to do and gets challenging but you have to find a way to put a positive spin on everything. What I've had to tell people who expect me to be moping for the whole year is that I still have a life I have to live and I'm not going to waste it throwing a pity party for myself. My husband's gone, it sucks, but I've got a, b, and c going for me. Does that make sense?

Before they are gone, imo, is the worst. It's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Before big M left this time I would condition myself. When he wasnt around I would just think about the deployment and really make myself focus on the bad parts so I could get used to it and not cry in front of him. It sounds dumb, but it actually made it a bit easier.

Okay i am rambling now. you CAN do this and you will!! And we will be here for you in whatever way we can be!

[Ashley945]

good points erin:)