Theresa
02-13-2009, 04:57 PM
i kept trying to log in and it said my password was wrong, so i kept typing it in. and it locked me out. and i tried to email someone. and i tried to do the "forgot password" about 7 times but the image verification kept saying i typed it in wrong. and so i had to make a whole NEW thing. and now i can't see anything. and im so frustrated!!
And as for Dan... it began on super bowl sunday.
I looked through his email (i know this is terrible... i know) and i saw he was getting messages and friend requests from a bunch of girls. So me being curious, decided to check it out.
I read his sent messages and i felt numb.
He messaged about 10 random girls (all from MN) telling them they looked cute and cool, and that he'd be back in MN in the summer and that he wanted to get to know them so they could meet up and get to know each other while he's back in the states for his 30 day leave.
?!?!!?!?!?!!$@#$%$&$#%@#!!?!?
was my first reaction.
But i knew i couldn't tell him i read his messages.
I talked to my friends, and they also told me not to tell him i read his messages.
So i didn't.
I decided to tell him, if he wanted to see other girls, "spread his wings" (so he calls it) then he can, but he cannot have me either.
He has to pick ONE. Makes sense, right?
I thought so..
He then told me, "OH now that you're making me chose between you and other girls, i'm going to chose you" ... is basically what he said.
So i thought ok... he wants to work this out, he wants to be with me.
No girl had messaged him back yet. So i figured this would stop.
All was great up until today/last night.
He messaged more girls, and one had started to message him back. I did not know what to think.
He actually WANTS to meet other girls, and SEE them, and "PARTY" with them while he's home on his leave..... what ever happened to being with me?!
So this morning he called me and I answered with a "Hi" ... he immediately knew something was wrong, but I wasn't going to tell him I knew what he was doing, I wanted to see how far he would actually go...
I tried to keep my cool, so I decided to say that, if he didn't want to be with me (the title, girlfriend, boyfriend, OFFICIAL, the whole she-bang) then I was going to stop pretending I was with him.
We have been "kind of" together since he joined the army three years ago. My feelings have never changed, I FEEL like we're together, and we ACT like we're together all the time.
And I decided to tell him that if he didn't want to make it official, I was going to stop pretending we're together. It's so hard, I've been waiting for him through all of this, I've sent numerous packages, I've been there when times were tough, I've had to go through the heartache of him leaving and being gone, I'm JUST like the "girlfriend", but he doesn't want to call me that.
I asked him why...
He said because he doesn't want to worry about me kissing other guys, hooking up with other guys, blahblahhh blahhh, basically he's afraid he'll get hurt, and he thinks that being official will actually make those feelings come out.
When in actuality, if he feels the way he says, then he would already have those feelings, yet not being official would make him ignore those "hurt" feelings, or hide them.
Anyways....
So i told him I was going to stop pretending we're together until we actually WERE. (thinking maybe he would realize what i actually mean to him, and that it's not okay to meet new girls behind my back, and keep me on the side; clueless.)
And that really tugged at his heartstrings, he got quiet and said. "I have a meeting to go to, but i'm going to call you back and i'll have something to say"
So i waited... and he called back.
He was calmed down, and began to talk about us actually being together, then he got to talking about trust....
(side story: i dated a guy for a week back in freshman year because i wasn't sure dan was the one. i was 100% honest with everything, i even asked for Dan's permission. he was fine and said, 'Okay theresa, do what you need to do for yourself.' So i did it. and i realized he wasn't Dan. okay well.... a drunken mistake happened during that week. and i told dan about a year after it happened. But ever since then, our trust has been rocky. )
So fast forward to now. ..
He got upset because I asked, why he wanted to be with ME, if he wanted to meet other girls. And he got pretty upset and started saying things like "who do you think i am, why do you always think im gonna go do that, just go hook up with other girls, i can't talk to them, i'm stuck in this shithole" stuff like that.
So i decided to tell him WHY i think he wants to meet other ppl, and i told him i read his messages.
And he then got really pissed said some things, and said "now you're really gone. better take those pictures off the wall. i'm just a peice of shit, why would you ever want to be with me"
and then said he had to go... and that he would call me back.
4 hours later, and he hasn't called back, and all his passwords are changed.
So i don't really know what to think of this ENTIRE situation.
:shrug:
And as for Dan... it began on super bowl sunday.
I looked through his email (i know this is terrible... i know) and i saw he was getting messages and friend requests from a bunch of girls. So me being curious, decided to check it out.
I read his sent messages and i felt numb.
He messaged about 10 random girls (all from MN) telling them they looked cute and cool, and that he'd be back in MN in the summer and that he wanted to get to know them so they could meet up and get to know each other while he's back in the states for his 30 day leave.
?!?!!?!?!?!!$@#$%$&$#%@#!!?!?
was my first reaction.
But i knew i couldn't tell him i read his messages.
I talked to my friends, and they also told me not to tell him i read his messages.
So i didn't.
I decided to tell him, if he wanted to see other girls, "spread his wings" (so he calls it) then he can, but he cannot have me either.
He has to pick ONE. Makes sense, right?
I thought so..
He then told me, "OH now that you're making me chose between you and other girls, i'm going to chose you" ... is basically what he said.
So i thought ok... he wants to work this out, he wants to be with me.
No girl had messaged him back yet. So i figured this would stop.
All was great up until today/last night.
He messaged more girls, and one had started to message him back. I did not know what to think.
He actually WANTS to meet other girls, and SEE them, and "PARTY" with them while he's home on his leave..... what ever happened to being with me?!
So this morning he called me and I answered with a "Hi" ... he immediately knew something was wrong, but I wasn't going to tell him I knew what he was doing, I wanted to see how far he would actually go...
I tried to keep my cool, so I decided to say that, if he didn't want to be with me (the title, girlfriend, boyfriend, OFFICIAL, the whole she-bang) then I was going to stop pretending I was with him.
We have been "kind of" together since he joined the army three years ago. My feelings have never changed, I FEEL like we're together, and we ACT like we're together all the time.
And I decided to tell him that if he didn't want to make it official, I was going to stop pretending we're together. It's so hard, I've been waiting for him through all of this, I've sent numerous packages, I've been there when times were tough, I've had to go through the heartache of him leaving and being gone, I'm JUST like the "girlfriend", but he doesn't want to call me that.
I asked him why...
He said because he doesn't want to worry about me kissing other guys, hooking up with other guys, blahblahhh blahhh, basically he's afraid he'll get hurt, and he thinks that being official will actually make those feelings come out.
When in actuality, if he feels the way he says, then he would already have those feelings, yet not being official would make him ignore those "hurt" feelings, or hide them.
Anyways....
So i told him I was going to stop pretending we're together until we actually WERE. (thinking maybe he would realize what i actually mean to him, and that it's not okay to meet new girls behind my back, and keep me on the side; clueless.)
And that really tugged at his heartstrings, he got quiet and said. "I have a meeting to go to, but i'm going to call you back and i'll have something to say"
So i waited... and he called back.
He was calmed down, and began to talk about us actually being together, then he got to talking about trust....
(side story: i dated a guy for a week back in freshman year because i wasn't sure dan was the one. i was 100% honest with everything, i even asked for Dan's permission. he was fine and said, 'Okay theresa, do what you need to do for yourself.' So i did it. and i realized he wasn't Dan. okay well.... a drunken mistake happened during that week. and i told dan about a year after it happened. But ever since then, our trust has been rocky. )
So fast forward to now. ..
He got upset because I asked, why he wanted to be with ME, if he wanted to meet other girls. And he got pretty upset and started saying things like "who do you think i am, why do you always think im gonna go do that, just go hook up with other girls, i can't talk to them, i'm stuck in this shithole" stuff like that.
So i decided to tell him WHY i think he wants to meet other ppl, and i told him i read his messages.
And he then got really pissed said some things, and said "now you're really gone. better take those pictures off the wall. i'm just a peice of shit, why would you ever want to be with me"
and then said he had to go... and that he would call me back.
4 hours later, and he hasn't called back, and all his passwords are changed.
So i don't really know what to think of this ENTIRE situation.
:shrug: